reality

as excited as i am .. i spoke with a close friend who has the gift of being very direct (smile).  how am i going to make money, how am i going to market, why would anyone come, what is my population.. 

ok.. i called her with some glee in my step and then i thought.. this is serious, and first thing is first - what is my mission statement.

i can't make a mission statement for my vision while trying to please everyone else.  i want to be non-offensive and inclusive; however, intentional.  that's a delicate balance isn't it.  it is making an assumption that i am going to stand before a group of women and in so many words communicate ~ follow me ~

i think most would see me as a leader and surely this stems from me being the oldest of four - me & my 3 brothers. the interesting thing about God's gifts is that what would seem difficult to some is not for others.  i mean - sure it is nerve wrecking to get up and speak in front of people i don't know very well - or at all, but it feels better to be the one talking - than the one cringing.  i think what i have said before is that my passion to get a group together and moving forward is greater than my fear of leading. 

i love to see what is on each person's mind - not just the individual's talking.  being aware of the anxiety surrounding the worry of saying the wrong thing prompts me to be the one listening.

i am also passionate about authentic conversation.  looking at my life and history i think it would be fair to say i have known lots of people, and i think for the most part have experienced good intimacy (me knowing them - them knowing me).  being curious about the factor that contributes to this - it would have to be genuine interest.  i tell people - i don't smile as i'm walking down the hall because i am suppose to, i smile because it is my nature.  i don't laugh and talk with people because i am suppose to, i laugh and share because i enjoy people. 

as my experiences with teaching and understanding risk and protective factors grow, i have become more and more comfortable with the spectrum of emotions.  i don't lose my head in an argument, I am not swayed with flattery.  i am always after the heart discovery.

so i need to be thinking of a mission statement.  i need to be seriously taking ownership of this project.

Thank you Lord ~ I am at rest in this tight spot where the wing meets the body ~ i will seek your encouragement as i make my way towards the feather wind spot (smile).